Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Interview Postmortem

First off, on my way to the interview I was asked if I were a working girl. While that might have been more financially rewarding than what lay ahead, I tried to, as graciously as possible, turn down that stunningly awkward proposition.

The mass transit experience was not wholly unpleasant, likely due to traveling in the opposite direction of pretty much all traffic at that time in the evening. Coming home I managed to just squeak onto the bus, which is good, because waiting a half hour wasn't really something I relished.

Now... for an interview's first question to be "say, do you suppose you could lose about 20 lbs...?" is never a great sign. I fought the urge to drop an F-bomb and smiled sweetly. Turns out that (allegedly) the person whose spot I'd be filling had a major cardiac incident. Listen sweeties, weight is ONE factor to cardiac incidents and although I am a pretty heavy hitter in the body mass department, I do not (knock wood) have any major health defects. So... we got the massively inappropriate questioning out of the way right away and I am more than a little concerned that some Oglebunny is probably going to be chosen over the less svelte but more competent me. (And I frikkin LOVE the term "Oglebunny"). The other concern is that the previous person did not drop dead from their cardiac incident so, ummm, aren't they coming back to their job?

Moving on... I seem to have suitably impressed interviewer number one who called out interviewer number two. I am not as certain that I impressed interviewer number two but they did ask for my references before I left and I have no worries at all about my references.

BUT... here's the kicker. They didn't even have a copy of my resume. Neither of the interviewers, quite frankly, had very good interviewing skills. They WANT an Office Manager, they just don't want to PAY for an Office Manager. I got the very distinct feeling that I may know more about running a business than at least one of these guys. I certainly know more about computers and social media. If they only want someone temporarily until their superstar comes back, I'm willing to live with that, but I don't want to be surprised 3-6 months from now when she's ready to come back and I find myself suddenly de-jobbed. Also, the job doesn't pay very well at all and 90 days is a damn long time to wait for a salary review when you're forced to rob Peter to pay Paul for 3 months and, honestly, getting a $5 an hour raise is unheard of, to my knowledge.

I am convinced that they have had trouble finding and retaining quality help because they do not do things like have resumes in hand and know anything about their candidates before they come in to the office. I will be interested to see if they call any of my references (and I WILL know if they do) or if that was a bluff. Given the fact that they OBVIOUSLY don't know anything about Employment Law or legal/illegal interview questions, I can see where the whole reference thing could get quite ugly. Fortunately, I have superstars for references and am not at all concerned.

Bottom line is that if I don't get this job, it won't be because I didn't try. I worked my ass off "selling myself"... but they're going to take the rest of the week to interview and "try" to decide by Friday. Send me good vibes and send some bad juju to the Oglebunnies!

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